Geekscape Picks the Best & Worst in Geek Culture 2009!

Geek culture began simply enough in a school, or playground somewhere, in which two young lads – or lasses – cavorted up to each other and struck up a conversation. It began something like this: “Who would win in a fight…?”

And so it was that our geek culture was formed. 

Here’s what we loved – and hated – in 2009!!!

——- WILLIAM BIBBIANI ——-

BEST GEEK MOMENT OF 2009

1. Academy Award Winner Roger Corman

Sometimes it seemed like Hollywood was a little ashamed of Roger Corman. The man alternated between directing quality entertainment (The Pit and the Pendulum) to real stinkburgers (It Conquered the Earth, perhaps the first movie with a spoiler for a title), but used his financial success to give inexperienced directors their first big break (Martin Scorsese, James Cameron and Joe Dante, to name but a few) and import classier foreign films – like The Ingmar Bergman’s Cries & Whispers – to America for the first time. He earned this Lifetime Achievement Award years ago, but finally got it in 2009, giving geeks not just a reason to rejoice, but a reason to be proud.

2. Wrastling with Ted Raimi

A personal choice, as due to a technical snafu very few have been able to enjoy it with me, but this last summer I interviewed one of my idols, Ted Raimi, and it was a blast. The man was funny, but didn’t sacrifice intelligent answers for the sake of a quick gag. We talked about his career, his work ethic, even his relationship with his father, and ended the interview by wrestling each other. Best. Interview. Ever.

3. Star Trek is cool again (Pretty simple: JJ Abrams made new fans, rather than appeasing old ones.)
4. Duke Nukum Forever cancelled (It was like having a long-distance girlfriend break up with you. Sure, your daily life isn’t changed, but hope for future satisfaction wanes. It’s time now to grow up.)
5. Dick Grayson takes over as Batman (About fucking time.)
6. Battlestar Galactica actually explains Baltar’s visions and it doesn’t suck (Be fair. They said it to our faces all the way back in Season One.)
7. Heath Ledger wins a posthumous Academy Award for playing a supervillain (Nice, but bittersweet.)
8. Uwe Boll releases a movie that doesn’t suck (Seriously. Two whole freaking stars to Far Cry. I’m as surprised as you.)
9. District 9 and Paranormal Activity give Hollywood the finger (And neither were in 3D! Hmm…)
10. Basement Jack finally released

Another personal choice, ladies and gentleman, because I appeared in this – actually pretty darned good – film as a murder victim. Yup… Living the dream. Check it out, ‘Scapists!

WORST GEEK MOMENT OF 2009

1. As the World Turns Cancelled

Helen Wagner (left) had been playing the same character for 53 years, even speaking the first lines of the series, “Good morning, dear.” Other alumni, like Julianne Moore (on the right, playing identical half-sisters/cousins) went on to more prominent places in Geek culture.

No, really, I mean this. Even if you don’t see the connection between soap operas and the rest of geek culture (if nothing else, they’re often a testing ground for acting talent, and ATWT alone introduced audiences to James Earl Jones, Mary McDonnell, Martin Sheen, Julianne Moore, Kristana Loken, Parker Posey, William Fichtner, Jordana Brewster, Marisa Tomei and Amanda Seyfried, to name but a few), As the World Turns and its endangered soap opera ilk are closely tied to our greatest passions, and they’re getting the shaft right now. Soap Operas and Comics are both visual mediums that are serialized for decades. Like Superman, Batman, Spider-Man and the rest, As the World Turns has been on the air for over 50 years, telling stories about the same characters and keeping it interesting the whole damned time. Sure, Julianne Moore somehow ended up playing identical twin half-sisters/cousins, but the next time you judge a soap opera harshly try explaining to a layperson the whole Madelyne Pryor/Jean Grey thing without sounding like you need your head examined. To put it another way, imagine if DC decided that after the Superman rights got screwed up (see #3), they’ll just cancel all Superman stories. No reboot from #1. No hope for return. They just cancel the thing as of September and, as a farewell gift, remove all the original talent from the series and give it to somebody like Rob Liefeld for the last few issues (which, essentially, is what the makers of As the World Turns have done). At least have some sympathy. “Good night, dear” indeed…

2. EVERYONE FUCKING DYING (Seriously, it seemed pretty bad this year, didn’t it?)
3. Superman rights get completely screwed up (We’re happy for the plaintiffs, sad about potential impact on the character.)
4. Avatar makes MORE money in its second weekend (How long is it going to take, people?)
5. 3D (It’s not a fad. It’s an interesting tool that Hollywood has latched on to because it needs a fad right now in order to sell tickets.
6. Dark Reign breaks my camel’s back (Read less than ten Marvel comics this year, and bought fewer than that. I really don’t care any more about their characters, because their stories are exhausting.)
7. Brutal Legend not as good as Psychonauts (We really set ourselves up for that one, didn’t we?)
8. Blu-Rays that make you pay extra for unwanted DVD and Digital Copies (Can you imagine this in books? For 30% more than the cost of your book, we give you two crappier copies of the same book! WHY IS THIS THE ONLY WAY I CAN BUY MONSTERS, INC?!)
9. Wall-E loses Academy Awards for Best Sound/Sound Editing (Not getting a Best Picture nomination is one thing, but SOUND?)
10. Crank 2: High Voltage on Blu-Ray (Unplayable unless your Blu-Ray player has sufficient memory. Many do, but many didn’t. Not cool, guys…)

BEST GEEK PRODUCT OF 2009

1. Playstation 3 (after the price cut)

The problem with the Playstation 3 was never the system itself – it’s a genuinely excellent Blu-Ray player and has comparable perform to the Xbox 360, for the most part – the problem was justifying its ridiculous cost, especially since most people already had Xbox 360s (which, again, is comparable as a videogame console) and other excellent Blu-Ray players were getting over 50% cheaper. With a $100 price tag and a more “TV Cabinet Friendly” design, the Playstation 3 finally achieved its true marketability potential… several years too late.

2. Xbox Live Arcade (Basically its own mini-console right now, presenting great games all year like Shadow Complex, Trials HD and “I Made a Game with Zombies In It,” which I refuse to spell any other way.)
3. Netflix Streaming (Thanks again, Xbox!)
4. Classics on Blu: The General, Gone with the Wind, North by Northwest, The Prisoner… (Despite a few token releases, great catalogue titles weren’t in great supply on Blu-Ray. Thanks 2009!)
5. This Ain’t Star Trek XXX (The best porn parody so far works not just as erotica but also an amusing light-hearted parody of the original series, and can be watched without the sex!)
6. Beatles Rock Band Instruments (I didn’t actually need new instruments, but if I did these well-crafted plastic replicas would be exactly what I needed.)
7. Batman Arkham Asylum (First good Batman videogame? It’s making the list.)
8. Night of the Creeps on Blu-Ray (Never even on DVD, now it goes straight to high-definition. One of the best films ever just got better.)
9. Dollhouse on Blu-Ray (Rediscover this under-rated gem with an unaired Season Finale that’s not only the best episode of the series, but places even the weakest episode in the series in eerie context.)
10. The Maxx and The Head on DVD. (No Blu-Ray – yet – but these two excellent animated series from MTV in the 90’s finally made it to DVD this December. If you haven’t seen The Maxx, you owe it to yourself to experience TV’s most faithful comic book adaptation ever. And The Head’s just weird and awesome.)

BEST GEEK MOMENT OF 2009

1. Streaming Netflix on my 360

It’s the small victories people, it really is. Who would have thought that having the supreme online movie rental service integrated with my video game console would be so damn awesome? If anything, this gives me even less of a reason to put on pants and leave the house. Ain’t the future grand?

2. Seing Watchmen on the big screen (It may not have been perfect, but gosh it’d been a long time coming)
3. The success of District 9 (Proof that smart ideas trump big-named stars any day)
4. The success of Paranormal Activity (lame movie, but, it gives hopes to budding Spielberg’s all over)
5. The Return of Friday Night Lights (let me just say…Daddy missed you)

WORST GEEK MOMENT OF 2009

1. The Rise of 3-D

F-ck 3-D. There I said it. It’s a gimmick… always has been, always will be. If I wanted to spend three hours uncomfortably slouched, struggling to see a three-dimensional picture from an obscured viewpoint, I’d start stalking my neighbor again. Instead of 3-D, I’d much prefer a well-told story, but I guess I’m just old fashioned like that. To make things even worse, 3-D jacks up ticket prices by three bucks.  No thank you, Hollywood.

2. Transformers 2 (Painful. Just painful)
3. The Twilight/Vampire Phenomenon (Twitards. ‘Nuff Said)
4. X-Men Origins: Wolverine
5. Ace Ventura Jr: Pet Detective (Seriously, this is a real movie. I’m not joking)

BEST GEEK PRODUCT OF 2009

1. Windows 7/ Mac OS Snow Leopard

Amidst the litany of Mac hating and PC bashing, the two big boys in the world of computing both managed to release two new operating systems. And, wouldn’t you know it? They’re both pretty damn good. Each OS contains a slew of robust features. Not to mention, they both have pretty graphic interfaces, and have firmly launched us into the world of 64 bit.

2. The Canon 7D (Digital SLR and HD camcorder… hmm… oh the possibilities)
3. PS3 (Price Drop)
4. iPhone 3Gs
5. MacBook Updates

BEST GEEK MOMENT OF 2009

1.  Jackie Earle Haley becomes Rorschach

Regardless of what you thought of the movie, there is no arguing that this guy totally 100% nailed what we all thought Rorschach to look like and sound like, both in and out of the mask. There were moments when sitting and watching this movie where I had to pinch myself, and wished I could go back in time and tell the teenage version of me that one day, not only will Watchmen get made, but Rorschach was gonna be pitch perfect.

2.The Black Lanterns rise and unleash psychological hell on our heroes in Blackest Night.
3. Old Spock says “I have been, and always shall be, your friend” to young Kirk, causing a lump in the throat on all old school Trek geeks worldwide.
4. SPOILERS FOR INGLORIOUS BASTERDS – World War II Ends in a WAY cooler fashion than in real life.
5. Dr. Manhattan’s Origin – Arguably the most complicated part of the comic is translated beautifully.

WORST GEEK MOMENT OF 2009

1. Terminator Salvation 

We’ve been waiting forever for the “Future Wars”, and they were just… eh.

2. Transformers speak Ebonics
3. Yet Another Saw movie comes out
4. Not enough people went and saw Drag Me to Hell, insuring more torture porn and remakes sequels.
5. Starbuck is an Angel. Whatevah.

BEST GEEK PRODUCT OF 2009

Star Trek 2-Disc Blu Ray

Back when DVD first came out, the studios were trying to lure in the early adopters, the film geeks, into buying their product. Every movie it seemed came loaded with special features. In the last few years, DVD’s have gotten lame on us and the studios have cheaped out. Except that the new Star Trek Blu Ray is old school, chock full of special features that are actually cool. You haven’t spent this long with DVD extras since you got that Lord of the Rings Extended DVD set 5 years ago.

——- JIM PELLEGRINELLI ——-

BEST GEEK PRODUCT OF 2009

Blackest Night Promotional Power Rings, DC COMICS

When I was four, I wanted nothing on Earth more than a power ring. Now I have eight. EIGHT! And they were free! FREE! Two fists full of power rings! They make it hard to type, and forget about playing Xbox, but. TWO! FISTS! FULL! OF! FREE! POWER! RINGS!