Top 10 Most Bad Ass Movie Teens
Every once and a while you’ll be watching a teen flick and go… damn… that kid is so bad ass… I want to grow up to be him (this is of course when you’re 30 and slightly idolizing a “supposed” 17 year old kid). Now everyone says Ferris Bueller or Spicoli but let’s face it: they weren’t all that bad-ass (just lazy).
THESE TEENS WERE BAD ASS:
10. Mark “Hard Harry” Hunter (Christian Slater) – Pump Up the Volume
Has anyone ever watched this movie and NOT wanted to start a pirate radio station? Mark Hunter has it all… unreleased Beastie Boys tracks, thousands of fans and Samantha Mathis willing to take her shirt off for no apparent reason at all. He also taught us to “Eat your cereal with a fork and do your homework in the dark”. That lesson alone got me through freshman year of college.
9. Max Fisher (Jason Schwartzman) – Rushmore
Max Fisher isn’t a bad ass by normal standers but you can’t deny that putting on a play with explosions is pretty badass. Not to mention that he starts building an aquarium on school grounds without any permission from administrators as well as knows a guy who can get you piranhas.
8. Ruper ‘Stiles’ Stilinski (Jerry Levine) – Teen Wolf
There’s nothing like a party animal that can help you go from a typical nerd to a full blown marketing image. Wolf Mania blew up and it’s because of Stiles campaigning with “Wolf Out” t-shirts and allowing Marty McFly… I mean… Scott Howard to surf on the roof of his van all over town. And exactly “what ARE you looking at, dick nose?”
7. Dudley “Booger” Dawson (Curtis Armstrong) – Revenge of the Nerds
Okay. So with a nickname like Booger it’s easy to assume that he’s a nerd, but damn it if he’s not the coolest nerd ever. Furthermore… I never really understood why he was one of the nerds but I’m glad he was. He busts out mega joints to light up a party. He wins burping contests and he loves Pi. A major part of being “bad ass” is not giving a F*@% and Booger exemplifies this in spades.
6. Patrick Verona (Heath Ledger) – 10 Things I Hate About You
He’s a romancer. He’s slick. He’s got a sexy accent and allegedly a duck (everything but the feet and beak). Ladies in bands want to date him because after every fight he buys you an instrument and he’ll sneak out of detention just to play paintball. You try making Shakespeare this bad ass and see how far you get. Even DiCaprio came off looking like a whiny bitch and he was in The Beach screaming for 2 hours.
5. John Bender (Judd Nelson) – The Breakfast Club
This list just got real real, mofos. Can anyone even attempt to pretend that John Bender wasn’t the coolest kid ever? There’s two types of kids who go to detention: people who are complete idiots that piss you off and those who are so amazingly bad ass that it was the only way to keep them down. Plus Bart Simpson would be catch-phraseless without John Bender’s “Eat My Shorts” sequence. This bad ass dared to mess with the bull and get the horns.
4. Joel Goodsen (Tom Cruise) – Risky Business
it’s not often a high school kid gets to build a brothel in his own living room, but Joel Goodsen did it and on top of that got to bone Rebecca De Mornay so yeah, he’s sort of a personal hero of mine. There’s absolutely nothing more bad ass than boning a hot Coug before you hit 20.
3. Jim Stark (James Dean) – Rebel Without a Cause
James Dean planted the flag early on what it meant to be a bad ass teen. Jim Stark was a teen that every women wearing figure-restrictive undergarments wanted to be with and every dude wanted to be. And you couldn’t beat him. Just ask Buzz… who’s attempt at wearing a bad ass jacket cost him his life. Oh, and if you want to be his little boy toy, man-friend you don’t end up so well either.
2. Jason “J.D.” Dean (Christina Slater) – Heathers
Now I don’t support murder at all… and after Columbine it pretty much guranteed there will never be another movie like Heathers that made this kind of behavior “bad ass”. Still… do you know anyone who was able to kill all the assholes at their school and make it seem like suicide? Nope… only a true bad ass can use a corn nut to kill.
1. Rudy (Ryan Lambert) – The Monster Squad
What did you expect? He strikes a match for his smoke on his Keds. He bullies the bullies. He peeping toms on your hot sister and he nails vampire chicks with wooden stakes. Rudy even taught that fat putz Horace how to stand up and be bad ass. If you haven’t learned this valuable life lession yet… I will allow this video clip from Geekscape Episode 10: Geekscape X-treme to do the speaking for me:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hckgneUr10
Now don’t you want to go back to High School and try that again?
